ok hello.

my brother reads my blog. how nice.

after that post on him

and thats not all my 2 sisters read it too.

thanks man,

how nice to see my siblings reading my blog -.-

anyway.

been really busy with trainings and stuff this few days.

and cause of new shits happening.

always have to end up in a bad mood trying to fix this or help with wadever,

but wadever.

shall not thik about it.

hahah

im gonna play audition.

=))

hmm..
hello?

super tired. again.
daphne elouis shikin ah ma yi lin cecilia just left my house.
wth sia.
i think my house turning into a gambling den.
the seniors- me daph elouis cecilia were playing mah jong
juniors- shikin yi lin ah ma playing tai di.
lols.
but daph and ah ma changed in the end.
played for about 2 hours or so??

then they left
most of them are scared of dogs.
and
my dog fudge has been barking a lot for the past few days.
kept running around in circles. lol.
and barking at them.
elouis shikin and ah ma were like so damn scared lah.
wth.
anyway.
we were super noisy in the room sia.
some of us singing.
some shouting and playing.
wa lau.
i think my sister couldn't stand it.
she came in. glared at us and slammed the door.
lol.s.
i think she scared them
=)
so here i am blogging.
super good sia.
i have been updating
anyway.
was supposed to go jie's house but changed my mind in the end.
quite tired.

we have 2 friendly matches on friday.
with hua yi and unity.
but i think theres gonna be another one.
wth.
training is tough.
today,.,
haix.
shall not say.
so im either going to study soon or ...........
not sure yet,

bye!
say hello to fudge!!
=))

heys..
hmm. im keeping up with the good work=)
im still blogging.
guess wad. my sis just sent me photos which she forced me to take.
in a peranekan or something like that
aiya just some outfit
which belongs to my ah ma.
and bloody hell. she keep saying i look like those nonya or baba.
wth.
!!!!!
hmm should i post those pictures or not?
ah wth.
shes alr forcing me to post it on facebook.
what difference will it make if i post it here.
....
get ready to rofl



yupps. i know.
dumb.
and my face is like super chubby lah
lols.
anyway.i just showed it to my second sister and she also
bloody hell go say i look like nonya also.
not that its bad lah
cause my family blood got peranekan.
but im like the only one among my siblings who looks like one.
unfair.
=(
and also the only one with curly hair.
thanks to my mum who only gave it to me.
!!!!



lols.
super random post.

anyway.
had training today.
tired!
then went for dinner with shikin elouis and jowilly.
at CS
chatted A LOT there.
and finally was able to watch my show(the little nonya -.-)
its quite nice noe!
anyway.
we left cause shikin saw her brother and omfg!
her reaction damn big sia.
made all of us like kan chiong and our heads knocked each other also lah.,
craZy girl.


anyway. downloading audition
fucking hell taking damn long lah.
wa lau.
started to play cause at first!
elouis keep asking me play i don wan.
then shikin they all kena psycho by elouis to play.
then like they play and like make it damn fun like that
and stupid me had a sudden urge to play it.
see!
end up having to wait 3 hrs for the thing to download
if the bloody thing cannot run ah
WTF!
i am gonna be so pissed off.

hmm
for now while waiting
i shall go play maple.
=))
lame. oh ya. i just started runescape also.
lols.
wth sia. start so many things.
sian must sleep early today
cause poor me has training tmr!
at 8.30
after that maybe rushing back home to bathe then off to my sister's house!
to stay over
=))
yay!
i think im gonna help her buy some groceries
cause i feel like i need to.
lols.
ok stupid?
hmm i better go tag wei chen's blog soon
bye!

heys..
i know ive nt been blogging for a super long while.
but still.
just felt the urge to pelt down my feelings today.

ive rotted the whole day away.
woke up early. went for piano.
came back.
played com.
ate lunch.
my bro forced me out of com.
so freaking pissed.
then,
read marley and me.
super nice book.
definately going to catch the movie.
i cried like omfg.
while reading that book.
but its also funny
=))

read a bit of geography and ate dinner.
the rest was even more boring
gosh.

super moody now
cause my ass of a brother came home from his freaking chalet and headed straight to the com which im using.
and forced me to go out.
usually. i had no choice but to let him,
but today.
i just felt bottled up anger exploding.
my mum came and was like shouting.
then started scolding me and i was like trying to get the fucking point clear that i should not let him get his way anymore
but!
to no avail.
he went to bathe and came out humming happily and in a very irritating way i would just go and punch his balls out.
all that while my mum was still nagging at me.
OMFG!
i swear.
i was fucking pissed.
then my mum said we both only has 1 hr to play each.
like wtf?
i am only using this com to play maple cause its the only one installed.
later i shall use the lap top
and i bet
my brother thinks he won.
he doesn listen to me.
or treat me as a sister.
he uses me.
and as much as i love him. he doesn seem to bother.
i seem like a fool crying over this.
and also as though im talking about my boyfriend or something//
well. my close frens noe about how my brother treats me.
they always tell me why bother?
but i just feel this obligation.
i guess its because he is my brother.
i just wished he doesn think he owns me and that all must obey him.

maybe im just jealous that he is someone who people will like more cause he is original or funny
and i am just always following rules.
not doing anything fun.
boring,
and just purposely trying to go wild hoping that others will think im not boring or just using that cover to hide my feelings.
dumb. i know.

almost everyone or maybe my relatives prefer him to me.
i can sense it.
im not jealous about that.
its just that he thinks everyone is against him.
that whenever we quarrel he gets scolded and nobody scolds me.
but really. he usually is the one who starts the fight but always think im in the wrong.
he always thinks that i let him down.
i didn do this or that for him.
he will jsut go i won do it cause u last time also never.
but there isn that last time.
i don noe how he remembers it or think about it but im sure ive repaid him after everything.

my family life's a mess.
i thought i was back to normal.
after letting out stuff today. makes me have this nostalgic feeling.
my mood has completely changed.
i have training tmr.
and i don think im going to be cheerful.
or maybe i will after a night's sleep.
lets hope so.

argh wad a stupid post.
after so long of neglecting my blog .
all i could come up is this??!??
sorry.

for don noe wad.
but.
yeah. im clueless.

im supposed to study for my re tests.
but i still cant get the mood.
there is something super wromg with me.
god!

im so crazy.
i fought with my bro over the com to play maple.
-.-
but here i am blogging when i could have just used the laptop without stirring a fight between us.
i guess i got fired up by the way he comanded or something.

anyway.
went fishing yesterday with jie and her frens.
quite fun.
caught a few small fishes and a baby sting ray.
but we let all of them back
=)
i guess yesterdays eventt kinda linked or built up the pent up feelings.
why?
i wont say cause i cant describe it.
i jus felt.
wadever.



super long post huh.
on the verge of tears while writing some parts.
i wish there is something or someone who could spice up my life.
and not anything more to bring it down further.
haha.


quite sleepy now cause of all those late nights and early rising.
but im going to stay up and play the computer and continue this stupid battle with my brother.

stupid right . i know.
there aer parts of the story which may not be suitable for posting up
i feel. but still..
i think some of my friends would noe.
i suddenly feel like talking to some of them.
just thought of elouis.
haha.
have been on the phone with her several nights investigating.
lols.
shall not elaborate.
my heads thumping. my vision blurring.
realised i was typing in the dark.
wtf.




is there really unconditional love?
i may have been blessed with it all this while but just not able to understand it yet.
i also want to give that love out but i just don't have the fortune maybe?
so... currently my life isn one that people will envy.
maybe tmr i will be more cheerful and look forward to stuff.
today should be just rubbish
right?

heys..
been at home for the past few days.
always supposed to go out.
but in the end.
i've been at home watching videos.
sleeping only in the wee hours of the morning.
waking up in the afternoon.
then going back to watching videos.
pathetic huh.
but what i wanna do leh.

exams are alr over but yet still has nothing to do.
as in i do not noe wad to do
haha.
wednesday will be dooms day.
argh..
i just do not noe what will happen.


ahh wadever.
=)